*Guest post from Parent Educator and New Mom School founder Alexandra Spitz
Have you ever been reading a parenting article or blog or found yourself in an online Mom community and suddenly you feel like a horrible mother and completely judged by others?
Yeah, me too.
See, the information is all well intentioned yet it doesn’t always feel good to read. Moms are so overloaded with information, most of it conflicting, how are we ever supposed to feel like we are making the right choices and doing the right thing? Every decision we make we look for validation on the internet. We look to bloggers, influencers, other mothers and parenting articles to give us the information about our own children whom they know nothing about. But we take their words and treat them like gold, often times going against our own instincts which can cause us inner turmoil.
So, what is the remedy? The remedy is setting yourself up for success and creating an environment of non-judgmental parenting in your life. Here are the steps to a happier you!
- S-T-O-P! If you are reading an article or blog post that starts to make you feel anxious and is lowering your confidence, stop reading! Move on to the next one until you find something that lifts your spirits and makes you feel good about your parenting. Trust me, there are plenty out there available for reading!
- LEAVE! Leave online social groups where moms are judgmental, condescending and putting each other down. You don’t need that negativity in your life. Keep trying new groups until you find one that is more supportive and positive.
- Trust your Gut! Trust your instincts when it comes to parenting decisions. Before going to the internet, assess the situation and go over in your mind what you think should be done and try it. If it doesn’t work, call on a trusted source in your life for help. Your pediatrician, a supportive friend whose opinion you value or a family member who is helpful.
- Clear the Clutter! Clear out those in your life who make you feel less confident. Their intentions might be good and they might have no idea they make you feel that way, but you are most important and you want to be the best you can be for your kids. Surround yourself with mom friends who empower you to be better and who celebrate the mother you ARE, not the mother you are NOT.
- Self-Care Isn’t Selfish! Happy mom = happy child. Make sure you are taking care of you. The best thing we can do for our children is model healthy self-care and making our needs a priority. We all have needs. When mom is taken care of, you have a lot more energy to take care of others. Trust me, everyone will appreciate a happier YOU! If you don’t believe me, just try it.
Cheers to a happier you in a less judgmental environment! Please share your experiences following these steps with us at moc.loohcsmomwen@olleh!
About the author:
Alexandra Spitz, Parent Educator, mom of two and Founder of The New Mom School. After moving to Orange County from Los Angeles in 2012, Alex launched The New Mom School filling the void of educational mommy and me programs. In just four years, it has welcomed over 1,100 moms and has become the go-to resource for new moms all over OC who flock to the program, registering months in advance of their due dates.